The Total Recall Remake - Yes, There Will be a Hooker With Three Boobs PDF Print E-mail
Written by The Projectionist   
Sunday, 22 July 2012 14:21

If you ask the average action film fan, (who will usually be male), what's the first thing he remembers about "Total Recall", the 1990 Action Sci-Fi classic that starred Arnold Schwartzenegger, he'll answer the "Consider dat a deevorce" scene, or the bulging eyes finale, he'll never answer, "The 3 boobed hooker." What's really the first thing that popped into his head? The 3 boobed hooker.

Click to View Larger - The Photo, not the Boobs... Click to View Larger - The Photo, not the Boobs...
Skim, 2%, and Whole - 100% Organic

When word came that the film was being remade, the one question everyone, (OK, all of us movie and titty fans here on the Internet), had on the tip of their tongue was, "Would da people get de aihr?" (Was I able to say that with a straight face?) All right, it was "They're gonna include the whore with the three jugs in the film, right?"

Unfortunately, this years version of "Total" will be rated PG-13, which means no tits, and only one utterance of the word "fuck". (Don't ask.) Luckily the great minds of Holywood spent many manhours trying to work out how they could stick to the PG-13 rating, and still keep to the spirit of the movie. (Hookers with three tits.)

Click to View Larger... Click to View Larger...
Is that TWO valleys I see?

So after many hours of conversation, arguments, and measurements, (oh, how they measured!) the big brains of movieland figured out what to do. Stick a strip of cloth across the actress' nipples. PG-13 means no nipple, it don't say nuthin' about over, under, or side-boob.

Click to View Larger... Click to View Larger...
Apparently naked hips and side-cheek are also OK in PG-13 films...

Total Recall will be released on August 3rd, it stars Colin Farrell, Kate Beckinsale & Jessica Biel. We'll leave it to movie-goers to decide if it's an improvement over the original.

Last Updated on Sunday, 22 July 2012 15:07
 

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